“Life is a Counterinsurgency.”
I’ll never forget those words spoken to me by a Marine friend of mine named Alex.
He was the Marine Corps Liaison to a DEA unit my Dad was running a decade ago.
He gave me those words of wisdom over dinner with my Dad and I ten years ago, as I interviewed him for my upcoming book I was writing, All Men Follow the Strongman: The Forgotten History of the Iraq War.
“Life is a Counterinsurgency,” he repeated. “I’ve lost my son, I’ve won my daughter, and my wife is on the fence!”
His words stuck with me…and nowhere have I found them to be more true than in the world of dating.
MY PAIN, YOUR GAIN
For good or for ill, my life has been unconventional since birth…and so have been my tastes.
This unconventionality is probably why you are reading this website…it’s something different than your average, standard fare.
But the unconventionality doesn’t just extend to this website.
It extends to my Love Life.
And this unconventionality has given me an inside look at many perils and pitfalls of the dating game in the Modern World that Evola was Revolting Against…
And not in the ways that you think!
BAGGAGE MAINSTREAM AND MAGIC
When it comes down to it, I’m an outsider from mainstream, White Collar, Suburbanite Society of these United States.
No Bourgeois Merchant Caste for me!
As such, the women that I have been involved with in one way or another over the years have been outside of this mainstream, too.
They fall into 3 Broad Groups:
- Religious Homeschooled Women
- Blue Collar Emo/Alt/Goth Women
- Eastern European/ Middle Eastern Women
Now I’ve been drawn to these women precisely because they don’t bring the baggage of the mainstream…baggage I detest and will not put up with.
As such, these women that I’ve been drawn to are generally magical creatures, separated as they are from the mundane.
But just because they don’t bring mainstream baggage, doesn’t mean they don’t bring any baggage at all!
And the kind of baggage that these women bring is as magical as they are themselves…
But this baggage is Black Magic!
And the only way to understand it is through good ol’ Alex’s famous quote:
“Life is a Counterinsurgency”!
BONDS OF THE BIZARRE
When it comes to the Religious Homeschooled Women…the baggage they bring to the table is analogous to dealing with the Taliban.
These cats are tribal, with the bonds of blood under the rubric of the “Nuclear Family” being the foundation of their entire lives.
What that means in practice is that the whole set-up is run off a familial hierarchy with the parents of the women on top…even when the women become adults.
Consequently, permission to access these women is required from the parental gatekeepers, and arranged marriages under the rubric of “Courtship” are common.
The justification for this bizarre system?
Just like the Taliban, they say it is “ordained by God”.
Very few people would put up with this system. But if you are raised around it, it is billed as not just normal, but moral.
But even to the most ardent believer, it gets old. And this leads to the seeking of greener pastures.
Au revoir, Talibanistan…
CODEPENDENT RECIPE FOR DISASTER
When it comes to the Blue Collar Emo/Alt/Goth Women…the baggage they bring to the table is analogous to dealing with ISIS.
This is because the threat that comes from them is the chaotic ex-husband.
Sometimes they come in the form of White Trash “Bad Boys”. Other times, they arrive in the guise of Black Ghetto “Gangstas”. But whatever their veneer, they all share a common substance.
I liken these men to ISIS because they are unpredictable, dangerous, and all over the place. These guys are not beloved by the wider society, and for good reason.
They are sometimes criminal, usually violent, and always out of control.
And the Blue Collar Emo/Alt/Goth Women that they usually attach themselves to are generally kind, giving, caretaker types…creating a codependent recipe for disaster if there ever was one.
Chaos in a love desert indeed.
STRAY CAT STRUT
Because these guys are looked down upon by society, they are seen as “beyond the pale”…I.E. out of sight, out of mind.
As such, society willingly cedes these guys’ long-suffering women to them as their “territory”, trapping them in the crazy ex-husband ghetto.
But because these guys are a cunning group of cats, they use this quid pro quo with society to cause trouble…even when it looks like they are not.
To con mainstream society, these ex-husbands usually try to sell that they are on a “Redemption Arc” to get mainstream pity and respectability.
But nine times out of ten, it’s total BS.
For while they wave the olive branch of peace, they’re fingering their handgun to cause chaos under the table.
These guys are not trying to change. They’re just trying to look respectable to mooch off society, while behind closed doors they continue to abuse their ex-wives that they refuse to leave alone.
And in the end, it’s the women who have to continue to foot this bill…long after they’ve broken up with these stray cats.
SPOILED, PETULANT CHILDREN
When it comes to Eastern European/Middle Eastern Women…the baggage they bring to the table is analogous to dealing with Saddam Hussein.
This is because the threat that comes from them is the ex-husband yet again…but with a different spin than in the bad group before.
Here, the ex-husband is still crazy and chaotic as above. But he does so from a place of authority and societal respectability within his culture.
Consequently, he gets societal backing to weaponize against his ex-wife who is exhausted from a lifetime of his society-sponsored shenanigans.
Like the ex-husbands of the Blue Collar Emo/Alt/Goth Women, the Eastern European/Middle East ex-husbands are spoiled, petulant children. They expect their wives to be their caretakers catering to their every whim, while bringing little to the table in return.
In short, they want a mother who they fuck occasionally when they are not mooching, abusing, or cheating.
As one woman from this group explained to me: “This is the culture over there, the mothers raise the sons to expect all this, and they think they are entitled to it.”
He doesn’t need to scam a “Redemption Arc” because in the eyes of his society, he is already akin to a god entitled to trod the earth under his feet.
And what’s worse, these guys do the same nonsense after the divorce…it seems like you are never really fully rid of them.
The Ghost of Saddam remains…
NURTURE AND NATURE OFF THE CHAIN
It seems to me that Eastern Europe and the Middle East seems to create women who are caretakers: kind, empathic, and with a deep spiritual connection to the world around them.
It seems that Epigenetic Nature is supported by Cultural Nurture in this. The Society of these mystic, far-off lands make the Women to be Givers, and the Men to be Takers.
For the Blue Collar Emo/Alt/Goth crowd, this Women as Givers/Men as Takers situation is the same. However, it seems to arise from Epigenetic Nature alone, as societal culture does not seem to nurture these traits.
Consequently in the West, a Woman being a Giver and Man being a Taker seems to be seen as low-brow, low-class, and subsequently taboo.
As such, White Collar, Upper-Middle Class Suburbanite Culture inverts this dichotomy, and makes the Men into Givers and the Women into Takers.
They call this set-up progress, morality, and civilization. It is seen as a status symbol that keeps the hordes of crime and barbarism at bay.
It’s a sick system all the way around.
And it’s the mainstream baggage that I refuse to put up with.
ONE THING I DO KNOW
“That’s a pretty grim picture you’ve painted there,” I can hear you say.
And you are right.
Which leads to the next question you’re probably asking:
“What’s a good old boy to do?”
To tell you the truth, I don’t know.
But I’ll tell you this…if I find out, you all will be the first to know.
But there is one thing I do know:
Good old Alex was right…
Life really is a Counterinsurgency!
And I intend to Win!
Sincerely,
Richard Barrett
06-28-2025
Written at 7:34 PM, in a den of iniquity somewhere in the USA…
PULP FICTION RENAISSANCE 
